Epidural

It's getting closer to the due date....well, 4 months to go, but time flies. I'm starting to think about epidural. I just told my husband last night, may be this time I will pass epidural. I don't think I'm going to need one. Why? I had bad experience with epidural both with my first and second labor. The first one I needed because I was induce. I was shocked and not prepare for it. So the doctor offered me epidural. I was agreed to had one. Since it was my first one and had a long labor, I was able to sleep and rest. Not until I was 9 cm dilated and was ready to give birth, guess what....? I had to wait for the doctor. It was Sunday that day, no doctor, my doctor was on vacation. The doctor that supposed to stay in Graha Medika, was in PIK. While I was waiting ... the nurse gave me second shot for epidural. It was horrible, one hour after they put more epidural, the doctor came and I'm ready to give birth. Yup....I can't push at all, I couldn't even feel the contraction. Isn't crazy? So they have to tell me when to push. It was horrible delivery. I don't know when to stop and start, my baby stucked for second and his head kinda in the bad shape. That's the first experience with epidural.

The second one.....

I was in long labor with the second one. I was admitted in the hospital at 1pm. Around 5pm, I'm still 4cm dilation. The nurse starting to offered me epidural, I said I'll think about it. I still can handle it. Half hour later, they warned me again, they said if you are getting close to give birth, I won't do it for you. IF you are about 6cm dilation, I won't give it to you because it's too close. After thinking for awhile, I decided to do it, because I thought ... well, if the baby born in the middle of the night, at least I still can get some sleep during the labor. It's 5pm and still 4cm. So I said, ok then, you can give me epidural. After awhile, I still can feel the contraction. I asked the doctor and they actually add the dose. I was numb up to my chest, I was scared because I feel that I couldn't breath. I hang in there, but the contraction getting stronger and stronger. About 2 hours later, I said to the nurse, I think I wanted to push. She said...no...don't push. I said, I am ready. Can you believe, I'm on epidural yet I can feel whatever is going on. The nurse didn't believe me, suddenly the doctor came in just wanted to check how I'm doing. And he said...you are ready. I'm like...yeah...that's what I've been telling the nurse, I'm ready to pushed. So they prepare everything in rush. It was like I never had epidural before.

I am wondering if anyone ever not using epidural may be you can share your experience about that. How much pain do you think it is? It's kinda tricky though, since every person has different tolerate of pain. I wanted to try may be this time go on birth without epidural. We'll see. I need to prepare myself from now. ;p

Well, another 4 months to go....I believe it will give me enough time to think about it.