Contentment

Contentment is a restful and trustful acceptance, appreciation and enjoyment of God's will, work and provision at each juncture of our journey with Him.

Two weeks ago I heard this sermon about contentment. It's kinda waking me up with all my dissapointment and disatisfying of life... (well, sometimes...). I forget that despite of everything that I complain, God still is good and provide for us. As in Philipians 4:12,13 says, I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed and hungry whether living in plenty or in want.

Paul learned to be content as God taught him to do so. When we are at the stage of having is chronic discontentment, it will drive our life crazy. What is chronic discontentment can do to us? Let's see what is the definition says ... it is a persistent dissatisfaction, frustation, agitation and impatience about our lot in life.

I am totally in there. Persistent dissatisfaction ... without I realized when I complain about things I am practicing that dissatisfaction of life. I will complain about how small our apartment is for the (will be) 5 of us. I will complain about how no one help me during the hard time when I needed. I will get frustation knowing that I will not get help all the time, like to have a maid or a sitter ( for those who is in Indonesia, I envy you sometimes!). The more I complain the more I get frustrated. It will drag me to a further negative thought and being depressed and starting to get impatience wanted to fast forward my life and see what happen next. Isn't it sad when you can't really enjoy your life?.

Well, after thinking for couple days, I think I starting to realized that I can make my life easier by doing the right things. To have that Chronic discontentment is a symptom of serious spiritual problems. I don't like that. I just wanted to be close to my God and have a satisfying in my life.

Here are the symptom of chronic discontentment just in case you need it to screen yourself :

- Fear and mistrust

- Pride

-Misplaced values and priorities

-Comparisons, greed, jealousy and envy

-Unresolved disappointments and unhealed personal pain

Being content can be learned. If we go to Philippians 4:11-13 --- I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. I know what it is to be in need and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed of hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do everything through Him who gives me strength.

Contentment can be developed when we have the right attitude, such as :

- Consistently count our blessings

- Replace grumbling with gratitude

- Deal quickly with disappointments

- Manage dreams and expectations --- make sure they are realistic

- Develop and live in a spirit of worship

- Trust God's love and power

Hebrew 13:5 --- Keep your lives free from the love of money and be content with what you have, because God has said, " Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you".

I can just keep going on and on about things that dissatifying in my life. But I choose not to continue put all that list in my life. I wanted to have a freedom of being discontent and starting a new perspective of life. I hope you can do the same too and I will pray that each of us can have the breakthrough in our life being content to what we have.

Have a great day...!!

taken from the sermon at the church of redeemer by pastor Dale O'shields

Park

After couple weeks of staying home, we finally decided to go to the park today. The weather was so nice. Considering it's summer, it was a really cool and breeze. The kids having fun in the park. Nicole starting to enjoy her time in the park. She walk more stable so she is able to walk around and do whatever she wanted to do. It was fun for us as a family to watch the kids play and also play with them. Time goes so fast, they are growing so fast.




Nicole trying to walk on the brigde that can move. She was a little scare. Jeremy was helping her , he make sure she doesn't fall down. They really had a great time in the park. We used to go to the park a lot during summer time, just to worn them out and get really tired. So there is none energy left at home. But guess what? They just have tons of energy that I have no idea where that come from. I wish I could have just 30% of it.



It's time to go.... summer is over soon. We still have 2 weeks to relax and have fun. After that Jeremy has to go to school. I'm glad they are having so much fun. Kids just love play outside. It seems like never enough for them to play in the playground.

Sonogram

Last Friday I went in for my 3rd sonogram. They don't usually do as much as it is, but since I have the fibroids they kinda wanted to watch closer just to make sure the fibroids doesn't getting bigger.

The sonogram went well. One of the fibroids already shrink and they can't even see it. Another one shrunk really tiny. Thank God everything went well and I don't have to go back until another 8 weeks and they are going to do the 4D sonogram. I can't wait for it. It will be exciting to be able to see her clearly.

Here is some cute picture that the doctor print it out for me. She said hi to her mommy. Look at her hand, you can actually count her fingers. They are 5. ;p

I can't wait to be able to see her in the next couple months. Still have to think about her name. It's getting closer and we have no clue what to name her. ;p

Midnite cry !!!

Sudah beberapa malam ini Nicole nangis terus tengah malam. Ampun deh....rasanya emang kalau punya anak itu nggak bakalan bisa tidur nyenyak sepanjang masa. Biasanya Jeremy yg nangis gara2 mimpi buruk. Dia sempat kena yang namanya night terror sejak umur 3 thn. Katanya bisa get better pas umur 5-6 thn. Emang sih getting better, but still, skrg jd nightmare. Parah deh. Dah berapa malam ini Jeremy did great. Nggak mimpi2 buruk lagi. Eh malah gantian si Nicole.

Hari pertama, begitu nangis digendong trus dibawa masuk ke kamar kita. Eh, malah mau main. Begitu dibawa langsung ketawa-ketawa, gua jadi tau, ternyata dia nggak apa2, cuma mau minta pindah aja. Buktinya begitu dibawa lsg segar bugar gitu. Hari kedua, masih dibawa lagi sampai bolak balik 4 kali. Sampai akhirnya gua putusin buat biarinin dia nangis aja. Dia tuh udah dari sejak 5 bulan udah sleep through the night dan nggak pernah lagi dikasih susu pas tengah malam. Jadi nggak mungkin donk gua balik lagi ke masa2 infant. Ogah banget, secara beberapa bulan lg gua bakalan punya newborn, so boleh dunk sekarang tidur nyenyak tengah malam. Gua gimana nggak sleep deprive kalau gitu terus.

Hari ketiga, dah nggak ada lagi deh pindah memindah. Yang ada gua samperin, gua gendong bentar, gua suruh tenang, dan gua taruh lagi. Dia sih dah kasih sign suruh gua jalan ke kamar gue. Tidak ada lagi deh migrasi ke kamar gua. Secara gua n suami dah sepakat bahwa nggak mau anak2 tidur bareng. Kecuali sekali2 kalau lagi sakit or lagi weekend semua ngumpul bareng. Other than that, kita nggak mau jadikan habit. Kasian donk mami papi kan perlu intimacy and ngobrol2. hehehe......

Jadi skrg ini tiap malam gua dengerin dia nangis sampe gua nya ketiduran. Dia nya jg akhirnya sadar nggak diladenin ya udah dia tidur juga, kan cape nangis terus. Mana anak itu drama queen, jd kalau nangis kaya disakitin gitu, pdahal nggak ada apa2. Tadinya sempat kepikiran mungkin dia mau tumbuh gigi grahamnya, gua olesin orajel diseluruh gusinya, yg ada dia kelabakan ada rasa2 aneh dimulutnya. Dari dia 4 minggu mang gua sudah melatih dia buat tidur sendiri. Waktu dia umur 4 minggu, gua tahanin diri dengerin dia nangis, sampe gua pikir gua tuli. hehehehe......kebiasaan dengerin dia nangis sampe 20menitan, tiba2 one day dia pas ditaruh cuma nangis 5 menit, gua bilang ma suami gua, eh coba cek si Nicole dah tidur ya? Kok tiba2 hilang suaranya. Eh beneran ternyata dia dah tidur, akhirnya sejak itu tiap ditaruh dia cuma nangis bentar trus lsg tidur sendiri. Gua jadi dah spoil bgt karena dari kecil dia dah gampang banget tidurnya. Jadi sekarang rada stess kalau dia bangun2 lagi.

Mudah2an tidak berlangsung lama, kasian Jeremy 2 minggu lagi dah mau sekolah. Kalau dah sekolahkan nggak mungkin tidurnya terganggu. Stages anak2 itu memang ada2 aja.

The Result

Well....after that crazy day... the result starts to coming in. The X-Ray's result came in first. They said nothing serious, it looks like he had constipation problem. I'm like...that's impossible. He goes to bathroom every single day and its a soft stool. He never having hard time pup. The doctor said it looks like he has small stomach ache and still have a lot left over that never get out. So they gave him Miralac, to empty his stomach. I thought that was it.

The next day, on Thursday morning a phone call woke me up. I had to woke up cause I know it must be the doctor calling. They always call early in the morning. So I forced myself to get up and pick up the phone.

The doctor said..." we got the blood test result back! we found something interesting. His blood sugar is really high. He can get in to diabetes category for being that high". It was like lighting struck in my head. How that possible happened? The doctor asked if he fast before they took the blood, I said no, he's been fasting long enough and couldn't wait anymore. So I fed him poptart before they draw his blood. So that day the doctor asked me to come early so they can draw another blood with fasting. So that morning we rushed to the doctor's office. Thank so much for my friend Janneth that came over with her twins to picked me up, cause I don't have my car that day.

The test didn't take that long, but the result was so disappointing. His blood sugar still high. Although it is so much better. From 160 to 102. Still over 100. So the doctor called some of the specialist to discussed what to do next. So he has to go through diabetic screening next week. Besides that, he need to see GI specialist, to find out what cause the stomachache.

I'm so nervous and going crazy. Imagine 5 years old kid have diabetes. It will be miserable for both the kid and the parents. Even right now, they said it's pre-diabetic condition, but I have to maintain the blood sugar level. It gave me headache to think about what to feed him. Every time he asked, can I eat this, can I eat that? I have to check all the nutrition label, make sure the sugar and the calories not too high. What happen when the school start?

Please pray that it's just a temporary thing and nothing serious. I never imagine if my child is having diabetes. He ate healthy food. He doesn't even like sweet. He can't even finish a lolly pop. How that happened? Only God know what is the purpose of that. We as the parents can only pray and pleaded for healing.

Stomachache

It's been two weeks that I haven't wrote anything. It's been a SUPER busy week for me. Within 2 weeks I have tons of story to tell.

After Nicole get better from her sickness... finally she can eat, play and walk around the house again... It's Jeremy's turn. My goodness....both are my kids hardly ever get sick. Around the year I can actually count how many times they get sick.

Anyway, he had VBS (Vacation Bible School ) that week. It was starting from Sunday evening through Thursday. That last day, I got a called from the teacher. It was 6.45pm, which is only 15 minutes after my husband dropped him off. I didn't get his message until 8.10pm. I was at work at that time. I tried to call my husband and wanted to know if he got him. He didn't picked him up until 8.15pm. Poor little guy.

After they got home, my husband told me that he throw up. I thought he probably ate too much watermelon before had dinner. So there was gas in his stomach. I just take it easy. The next day, he slept all day long. He threw up 5 times for the whole day. He can't even take a bite of bread. He was really miserable. He kept telling me it is hurt him so much. After a while I think its probably just a virus or Gastroenteritis. They said it can last for about 5-7 days. So I decided just to wait for the next couple days. See how he is doing.

Well, finally on Monday I took him to the doctor because there is no sign he will get better. I'm kinda confuse because his symptoms just confusing. He doesn't have fever, not throwing anymore, but he is still in pain. So I took him to the doctor. The doctor decided to run some test. Sonogram, X-ray, Upper GI, blood, urine and stool test. Just to make sure it's just a virus.

We had a long day with all the test. It took 2 hours for all the test. He had to fast, so we have to did it early in the morning. So all of us left the house at 7am. Trust me it's not fun when Nicole have to come a long. Thank God that Jeremy was cooperate and did everything by himself.

Since, I am pregnant and had Nicole with me, I wasn't been able to participate in the X-ray room.

After all done. We had lunch together with my husband. Since the lab and my husband's office kinda close. We went to the mall for lunch. I did that on purpose too cause I have to wait Jeremy to pup. I don't want to come back and forward just to drop the sample. After lunch he finally did his business. My husband dropped the sample to the lab.

On the way back, suddenly my car died on the road. My goodness......what is wrong with my day. I think I had enough. Nicole was so tired. She is been up since 6.30am and it was 1.15pm. She missed her morning nap and was so tired. I have automatic car, so when the machine died, it switch in to manual. It was scary if I have to push it to the highway. So I tried to park in the parking lot. It won't start again. I called my husband and he had to take half day off. I waited for 45 mins. We called the tow car and didn't come until 2 hours later. I am super tired. That night everyone went to bed at 8pm. I called out from work, I won't be able to make it.

What a dayyyyy.....!!!!

TO BE CONTINUED......